The process of starting over and healing is an open door for self-reflection. In many ways the life I used to live ended, and I was given a chance to reinvent myself, change directions, and become a better version of myself. But change doesn’t happen simply because it can. We have to choose to show up in life differently, or the habits and patterns that lead to struggling, unhappiness, and failure will continue to lead us in the wrong direction. When you’re down do you ask for help, get lost in sorrow and disconnect from life, pretend everything is okay, escape (party/drink/eat/watch tv) to mask the pain, journal, read self-help books, workout, or set goals to make your life better?
I took my opportunity for a new life seriously. Like an intern eager to learn, grow, and prove myself worthy, I dove into self-reflection, journaled daily, faced my sadness head-on, read and listened to motivational influencers, and set goals (simple daily goals like drinking enough water, to big-picture goals like starting this blog, saving money, and paying off debt). I forgave myself. Let me say it again, because this was the hardest part and also the most important: I FORGAVE MYSELF. If you hold onto anger, regret, fear, and unhappiness, you’ll live in the past forever. When you feel broken, worthless, overwhelmed and lost, the first step to healing is giving yourself permission to heal. And the second step, which I believe is even more important, is loving yourself. Give yourself grace, patience, and self-love in every aspect of life, and you’ll discover that the journey from darkness to light is so meaningful and rewarding.
My healing journey has been a pendulum between happiness and sadness, and I’ve come to appreciate both. Happiness is the reassurance that I’m moving in the right direction, while sadness motivates me to keep pushing forward, and reminds me that my efforts to change and improve are necessary. It’s easy when we start feeling better to slack-off on the positive habits and proactive efforts that brought us this far. DON’T GIVE UP ON YOURSELF! You are worthy of living the very best life, and staying true to your authentic person is what you deserve, so set goals and put the effort in to create a life you’re happy to live!
We all feel lost at times, we all feel broken, and we all have regrets, desires, hopes, and unfilled dreams. Our scars and failures don’t define us, it’s how we show up after we fall down that matters! It takes bravery to change, so everyday until it becomes your truth, look yourself in the mirror and say “I am brave, I am worthy, I am special, I am enough, I am happy to be me.”